The Slow Gin Fizz

http://newyork.craigslist.org/que/roo/1515634549.html

1. I wrote the longest room for rent ad in the history of time and yet managed to say remarkably little. talent!
2. everyone else’s ad was boring and they smell
3. in 4.5 years in my apartment, I have never once raised my voice to a roommate. I save that for Rachel.
4. due to a spectacularly bad dating year, I will no longer be bringing any boys home and am too old to do so even if I wanted to
5. I don’t cook anything so there’s never weird cooking smells
6. I am big on vows of silence
7. you never have to talk to me before noon
8. my parents say I was the best roommate they ever had
9. I bring home sandwiches
10. CSI isn’t a very loud show
11. I NEVER listen to taylor swift…without headphones
12. gay cousin ted visits sometimes
13. since I can’t find an instructional book for my harmonica, that probably won’t be going anywhere
14. once I win the new drink contest, I’ll be pretty rich and famous and will be getting lots of cool stuff for the apartment
15. I hate people, so there’s never any wild parties